By focusing on what others achieve I forget the beauty of my own accomplishments. I am no stranger to comparison – it feels habitual, automatic. I continuously ask myself, am I doing enough? Is what I do even worthy? Oftentimes, my brain sees accomplishments in an incredibly narrow-minded way, as if some are more worthy than others because they are incredibly selective or competitive, for instance. It was a great accomplishment for me to get accepted to my university, but that accomplishment sometimes gets overshadowed by comparing myself to others who were accepted to more selective institutions. Basically, I don’t give myself enough credit for what I do because I feel others have done better than me.
But I want to change that mindset. For me, I think it all comes down to focusing less on comparison and more on self-growth. If I’m less focused on what others have accomplished, I give myself more time to look back on what I’ve achieved and continue to achieve, giving me room to be proud of myself and to grow from all I’ve accomplished. As I mentioned earlier, however, comparison feels automatic, which definitely makes this much easier said than done.
I think something I may try is keeping a journal or mental note of things I have accomplished either daily or weekly. What I like about this is that it forces me to notice accomplishments that aren’t reliant on competition or selectivity. And regardless of what my mind may tell me, I logically know that these accomplishments are entirely worthy, too. All accomplishments are worthy. Unpacking my bags and cleaning my room when I got home from college, for instance – that’s an amazing, worthy accomplishment. Drinking a whole bottle of water is an amazing, worthy accomplishment. Simply getting through the day is an amazing, worthy accomplishment. We accomplish beautiful things daily, and I think the more I focus on these things, the more I will recognize my worth as a whole. By focusing on what I achieve, I indulge in the beauty of my own accomplishments.
If you’re also struggling with comparison and thinking your accomplishments aren’t worthy, it could be important to reframe this idea of worthiness – it doesn’t come from selectivity or competition, it is inherent and tied to each and every achievement, whether that’s cleaning your room, drinking a bottle of water, or simply surviving. All are worthy.
This post is a bit on the shorter end, so I apologize for that! I’m still at the very beginning of my journey to try and focus more on myself and less about comparison, as well as fully recognizing my accomplishments and their worth. Maybe in the future I’ll make a second part! Before I close out, I want to open the discussion to you all (feel free to type in the comments!): what is something you have accomplished this past week? For me, I’ve made some cute crafts for my loved ones, which I am so proud of myself for doing! They turned out great, and I’m glad I put the effort in to create something special for them.
As you can see with the entirety of what I’ve written in the blog, I’ve got a lot to work on, and that’s okay! Whether it’s comparison, mirror checks, or TTM urges, I’ve got long journeys ahead of me. Maybe you do too, and it can definitely be pretty daunting. So, as always, I’d like to remind you:
I believe in you, and I am proud of you.
Something I’ve accomplished this week was sitting through my first horror movie in a theater. I watched obsession it was pretty spooky.
That’s amazing Andrea! What a lovely accomplishment 🙂
This week, I went to my first dance class in 6 months!
That’s so wonderful! Dance is such a cool sport, I hope you had tons of fun! 🙂
HI!! something that I accomplished this week was being able to cook dinner for my family everyday to take the load off my parents.
Oh my goodness how lovely! And I bet your meals tasted so great 🙂
Hi! Something I’ve been proud of today is trying out traditional archery for the first time. When I was around 10-15, I was an olympic archer and was pretty decent at it. However, competing at that level was super taxing on your psyche not just as an athlete but as your own value as an archer. Overtime, I was not shooting for myself, I was shooting for what other people thought of me; I quit after a lot of thinking, but I never really wanted to quit archery as a whole.
Now, being able to freely do it for fun, it felt like giving that version of me, a stressed and burnt out archer, a warm hug and telling him “I told you we’d find a way”. I never thought I’d be able to say that when I was at the height of my career.
I encourage everyone to pick something back up they used to love and do it in a new way. You never know what part of your heart you left behind that you wanted to keep!
What a beautiful comment Vi! As someone who played soccer very competitively when I was younger, that feeling of playing for others and not for yourself is so real, and SO taxing. I’m super glad you are now feeling free with archery and doing it for fun! Makes me want to pick up soccer again and revisit what I once loved so dearly!